The Twenty-One-Year-Long Gap

By Kimberly Walsh

I grew up in a small town. A town with very little diversity, and everyone knew everyone. My parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and brother all went to my high school. It was always driven in my head that you go to college after you graduate high school. I was a good student in high school and got good grades, but I also didn't try very hard. I lived in the shadow of my older brother. Once I read "Zen and Other Journeys" by Elizabeth S. Widdicombe, I felt I completely connected with the story on a different level.

When I graduated high school, I went to college. I went to Western Michigan University for my first semester. There, I felt like I didn't belong, still living at home because of how close it was. I then transferred to Grand Valley State University. I felt this would give me the experience of living in the dorms. I struggled with not knowing what I wanted out of my life, so I didn't try hard in my classes; I partied a little too hard. Eventually, I chose to move home after the semester was over. At this point, I started working full-time and not returning to school. Like in the story, "I told myself that I needed time to think."

As time passed in my life, I started to feel stuck. I needed to figure out what my purpose in life was supposed to be. When Widdicombe said:

When I decided to take time off, I felt some of the "burn out" the article describes. High school, though fulfilling, had been a blur of homework, extracurricular activities, and intense relationships. In the middle of everything, my parents had divorced. Though they both supported my desire to immerse myself in a different culture. I could tell my mother was anxious as she watched me pack T-shirts and water bottles into an enormous backpack. Neither of us knew precisely why I was leaving. To her, it might have seemed as if I were running away.

This stuck with me from the story because after feeling stuck or "burned out," I decided I needed a change in my life. Something that could allow me to find myself. I decided to move to San Diego. Even though my mom was supportive of my move and even helped me do it. She also felt like "I was running away."

This stuck with me from the story because after feeling stuck or "burned out," I decided I needed a change in my life. Something that could allow me to find myself. I decided to move to San Diego. Even though my mom was supportive of my move and even helped me do it. She also felt like "I was running away."

I lived in San Diego for four years before I moved back home to Schoolcraft. I made this decision due to family. A couple of years later, I became a mom. After this, I, indeed, found out what my purpose in life was meant to be. Although I found my purpose, I still was in dead-end jobs with no long-term future. Last year, I decided it was time to follow my dream for myself genuinely. I decided to go back to school at 38 years old. I wanted to be a nurse. In the story, Harvard admissions says, "Parents worry that their kids might lose their academic edge, but the truth is, they usually come back more enthusiastic because their educations is much more theirs." When I told my dad I was going back to school for nursing, he thought I was crazy. He said, "You haven't been in school for 21 years. You work full-time and are a single mother. What makes you think you can do it now."

I spent 21 years trying to figure out who I was and what I wanted to be when I grew up. I told my dad that the difference is now; this is not just for me. This is my future for my son and me. I want to be the best version of myself that I can be. I want him to see that you can do anything you want. I want him to be proud of me. I was terrified to return to school after so long, but it was also motivation to do good. I wanted to prove to everyone who thought I couldn't do it that I could. This time around, "my education is much more mine."

I don't regret my choices because everything I went through led me to where I am today. I like my life, even if it has taken me time. It makes me appreciate everything I have and drives me to work harder to follow my dreams. I genuinely feel that every child should be allowed a "gap year," even if it is 21 years. Every person is different, and it might take a little longer to figure out what and who they want to be.